Bored!!! (Read if Bored)

Ok so I'm bored so thought I'd write...have written in awhile so bear with me...what's been going on..well not much..fighting as usual with my dad. He's the most  Narcissistic ass ho in the world!! He thinks he's always right...hmmm...wonder where I get it from huh..lol... I have a hearing coming up soon on my sleep apnea issue... trying to show that it originated during active duty due to antidepressant meds I was on...zoloft, buspar, trazadone...yeah I'm fucked up...or normal depending on how you wanna look at it. Ithink people who can understand their depression, personality disorders, manic states..anxiety etc. are the ones who are normal! People who are always happy...sunshine and lolly pops...those are the ones with the real problems. They can't grasp reality so they make up a world where everything is HONKY dorry...watch out for people like this..they are the ones that would snap put in a stressful situation. I was talking with some friends the other day about how I wish I was never born and some times I think maybe I'm not explaining it right...it's like this...had I been given a choice to have been born or not shit I would've have chosen to never existed. I can't deal with knowing that one day my mom....brother, sisters, friends will die...Fuck that I don't want to go through that pain. And when I have a child...to have something happen to him or her...Hell NO!! I think I would go postal!! I couldn't recover from it! But as it is I exist....I exist to live everyday in a routine manner... my life is boring...the only hours that I can say that I'm not thinking about death is when I'm training....guess when you are doing a physical activity your mind is too exhausted to dwell on the negatives. I'm like a slug making his way around the world.....BLAH is the word that can best describe my existance! Anyways folks lets continue to watch as the economy plumets, races hate one another, our environment is destroyed...people manipulate and lie in order to profit...GREED, SLOTH, WRATH, PRIDE, ENVY,LUST and GLUTTONY.....Live it..Love it...Do it..WHo Cares anyways Right?


The Black Spiderman
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